Thursday, March 31, 2011

Crumble to Dust

You humble me.

When I feel like I am the only thing that matters on this beautiful planet. When I put myself before all the beautiful people you created. When I lose sight of what really matters, when I cant see your presence working and your beauty around me, you open my eyes. When I am on top of the little mountain I built for myself, you crumble it. I fall, but its not a long drop. I wasn't as great or as high as I thought I was. When I'm sitting in the rubble of my own mountain, humbled by your presence and your truth, it is the most peaceful and restful place I can be. What Glory and Beauty to see my earthly alter crumble at your voice! I could roll in that dust all day to eternity! Oh, to be humbled by my Father! You welcome me back to the straight and narrow path with Love, with Peace, with Hope, with Acceptance.

Humble me again and again my Rescuer!!
A Warrior for the King,
Bekah

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Branding Fruits.

a "Relationship with God." I hear that all the time...I hear it from some who mean it, some who imagine it, and from some who have never had it.

I am always in a fight with myself. "Do I have a relationship with God?" "Is my relationship with him growing at the pace it should be?" "Am I doing it right?" "Man, that kids got it going on... I should be more like him." "God, I know you are in there but its hard for me to see you or feel you right now. Does that mean you aren't there?"

I am a second guesser by nature... it has prevented me from seeing and doing many extravagant things, but in the long run, it has kept me safe from harm. I rely on myself a lot -too much. I lose, I win, and I give myself the credit for all of it. I feel like sin. I feel like "loser-pudding." I feel like everyone is advancing around me and I'm stuck playing "winner" when really I'm toppling over myself just trying to keep up. Why do I live my life this way? Its boring. Its fruitless. And its worthless.

I catch myself making my "main course" relationship with God a version of what he is teaching someone else at that time. That should not my relationship with him... it is nothing but a filtered version of someone else's relationship. Not that its wrong for me to be encouraged by what God is teaching and growing inside of another brother or sister, its just wrong to convince myself that that is all he is saying to me at the time. He loves me more than this universe he has created. So what He is speaking, just to me, is a pearl. A pearl crafted just for me to enjoy, know, understand, apply, and use as a tool to grow closer to Him. Just Him and Just Me. Together.
There are ups and downs in a growing, faith-filled, devoted life in the Father... I'm dealing with my downs at the moment. The cores of me that are earthly and not of my Creator and Love.

I want my relationship with God to be branded on me for everyone to see. I want people to identify me with a "fruits of the Spirit" branding. When I look at one of my best friends I can see every single fruit accounted for in his actions: Patience, Love, Joy, Peace, Kindness, Self-control, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness. He is branded to be a fruit-filled son of God. As for me, I can pick out at least four I know I act on from a day-to-day basis, but I want to be completely branded for my LORD! I want to be His daughter! A daughter in whom he is well pleased, a daughter he is proud to call his own... I don't want to let Him down... and I feel it is in my own strength that I should rely to do all this and the fact is... I don't have any strength. He knows and loves ONLY the REAL me- NOT the me that turns on whenever certain people are around, he doesn't know that me at all- He knows the me that is created in his image. The me he created me to be.

My friends, Brothers, Sisters. I pray, if you haven't already, that you discover the person who is JUST. PLAIN. YOU. this week. I pray you build up on that foundation and begin a new! For THAT is the child, creation, and beauty our GOD has destined you to be and has LOVED all this time.
A Warrior for the King,
Bekah
 

Thursday, March 24, 2011

I Just Want to Touch You.

I just want to touch you my King! I want to sit in your lap and know the lines of your face. What mystery lies behind your eyes? How can a man I have never laid eyes on, a wondrous being, a mystery! hold my heart and make me feel so strong? You build me up, you discipline my heart, you guard my soul. You CARE about every little immature molecule in my body, and you LOVE me for all of it! What corner of your heart was I made from? What is that special part of me that attracts you so unconditionally? I know I am whole in your arms... hold me. Even if I cant see your face just yet... just fill me up with you. What little I can hold is pathetic I know, but one day I will swim in Glory, with YOU.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Confirmation in Peter

This morning I sat down to do my quiet time. It was really boring... 1 Timothy 5. The entire chapter was directed towards Deacons and Bishops and their requirements... Im not even Catholic. (well... technically I am.... long story). I suffered through it and decided I could apply it to my life if ever I was to run into the Bishop and caught him in the act of bigamy or adultery. However, there was one thing out of all the requirements that really caught my attention, something I thought to be very wise.

1 Timothy 5:7 & 10

These verses basically said that God wants his leaders in the church (the bishops and the deacons) to have overcome some kind of hardship in their life. Why?... So that they are strong. Just like when you break your arm, and the bone has had time to heal, it comes back stronger. Just like when you're weightlifting, and you can feel your muscles burning, give it a day or two and they will have grown to be bigger and stronger. God wants his leaders to be overcomers. He wants them to have been in a place in their lives where only He could have rescued them from. He also wants them to be good leaders to the people. If my leader has been in a place that is far worse than any of my own circumstances, and God brought him out of that place, my God will surely bring me out too. He wants to show us that when our faith has been crippled, He has and will build it back up to be stronger and steadier than it ever was before. He wants us to call out his name!

Any-hoo... I felt like there was more God wanted to show me this morning, so I flipped through my bible and found a book that I hadn't finished yet. It was 1 Peter chapter 4. I could not believe it! The first two verses were talking about how one should model their life after their King, and how Jesus is not confined or restrained by time, and that the earth cannot hold him anymore. If you read my last blog entry, this is what God showed me yesterday in the topic of time. I was just kinda pondering in conversation with him, but for him to give me confirmation in his word this morning just prods me to keep up with him, it makes me see that this is all real and that he really does love me enough to speak to me in my thoughts.

Beloved ones of Jesus! Listen for His voice!
A Warrior for the King,
Bekah

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Coffee and Karma

This week has been chuck full of choices for me. After thinking and talking to God about all of it, he showed me something... He showed me that when it gets down the the nitty gritty of choice making... all it really is deciding where and how to invest your time... This got me thinking about "time" itself...

Things I know about time:
-It doesn't exist in Heaven
-Time is energy (heard that enough "time"s <-- haha)
-It limits us as humans
-It is constant and you can't change it
-It is limited. we will all die.

What I have determined:
My time is a limited non-renewable resource that is ALL MINE (...at least, after I graduate High School.... then its ALL MINE...). My time is something that only I can control how I spend. My time is a precious gift that Jesus died for.

This all made me question how I want to spend this gift Jesus has given me... This limited gift... This non-renewable gift. I thought about how he would wish me to spend it. I thought about how He is spending it (even now as I write this)... loving me, guiding me, in constant conversation with me.

This morning I spent my gift at Starbucks with my dad. Together, we spent our gifts talking about our Father in Heaven and how he is going to work in my life this year. This conversation is what started my mind reeling on the subject of choices. I decided if I were to model my life on how Jesus spent his gift of time (you know, instead of searching for ways to gratify myself), the choices I make in this life just might have a better outcome and I could send God a gift; my time spent for His glory. I acted on this concept this week. I have never felt the pride of my God on my life as much as I did in that moment and throughout the rest of the night. A rush of joy, pride, and royalty streamed over me and I knew I had pleased my King with my life, with my gift. Putting my own pride aside, putting my own wants aside, investing my gift in another person... Sound familiar? My Jesus did that. My Dad did that. My King did that. And when I did that, I was living in the image of my Father... and he was pleased with me.

I am praying that you all may receive the same gift, if not more, that I received this week!
A Warrior for the King,
Bekah Mezera

Signed: "A Warrior for the KING"

Hello! to all of you my dear friends and readers!

This is my blog :) I will be keeping up with it as often as possible (if not everyday while I am in YWAM) so that I can share with all of you what our Father God is telling me, showing me, building in me, and shaping me to be as a woman and daughter of his Kingdom! I hope as you keep up with me, you will be challenged and built up! I am praying that our KING may move and have his way with me and that we will all grow together with this experience!

Love you all and may you be blessed!
A Warrior for the King,
Bekah Mezera